Sure, and thanks!
"An unidentified man, wearing a green striped shirt, plummeted out of the window of the AtariAge building downtown this morning.
Startled onlookers remarked that the man had been riding a skateboard while attempting to hold onto several pieces of fruit.
During his fall, the man was heard to say “I feel strange”, “Phew, that was too close!” and “Ah, missed it!” Some people alleged that he may have been eating hallucinatory mushrooms.
Witnesses reported hearing others shouting at the man as he fell. Cries of “Awesome, dude!”, “May the fruit be with you!”, and even “You suck!” came from the crowds.
The man might have been attempting to save himself, as he made several futile attempts to grab at a heli-pack that was perched on one of the many ledges he flailed at as he went by.
The man’s whereabouts are currently unknown, since he seemed to just vanish into thin air at the end of his fall. Authorities are concerned that other people may attempt to copy the man’s stunt, and are currently in the process of posting additional security around nearby fruit stands."
And on the bottom of the page:
"In a related story, the financial sector was rocked when the prices of mangoes similarly plummeted to record lows.
Analysts speculate that either investors are confusing the headline in the above story with the stock price of mangoes, or they finally realized they have no idea what a mango actually is, and have no interest in buying them."
(It's actually readable when printed out on my Epson inkjet - just
very tiny.)